Trigger Warning: This article discusses harmful sexualised behaviors, sexual assault, and sexual abuse. Please take care while reading. If you need support, you can reach out to the services listed below.

- Survivors’ Network provides a list of local and national services. Link: https://survivorsnetwork.org.uk/resource/helplines-webchat-services/

- Rape Crisis offers a 24/7 Rape & Sexual Abuse Support Line, available every day of the year. Call free on 0808 500 2222 or visit https://rapecrisis.org.uk/get-help/want-to-talk/.

- SARSAS has a helpline and online chat available at various times, with e-support open 24/7. They aim to respond within one working day. Link: https://www.sarsas.org.uk/

- Samaritans has a helpline available 24/7, every day of the year. Call free on 116 123 or visit https://www.samaritans.org/

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Sexual abuse within families is often discussed in terms of adults harming children. However, a deeply distressing yet largely unrecognised issue is child-to-parent harmful sexual behaviour. While this topic is difficult to talk about, it is critical that we break the silence to ensure parents receive the support they need without fear of judgment, blame, or disbelief.

Recent research by us at PEGS has shown that 17% of parents experience inappropriate sexualised behaviours from their child, and 5% have been subjected to sexual assault and/or rape by their child (including both minor and adult aged children). Despite ongoing efforts to raise awareness, this issue remains heavily stigmatised and underreported. 

Understanding Child-to-Parent Harmful Sexual Behaviour

The dynamics of child-to-parent sexual abuse are uniquely challenging. Parental figures, who are traditionally in positions of authority and care, often struggle with feelings of guilt, confusion, and shame when faced with these behaviours. They may hesitate to report or seek help for various reasons, including concerns about criminalising their own child.

Their fear of judgment and shame, alongside limited support services, leaves many parents feeling increasingly isolated and alone in their experience, making it harder for parents to find the support they need.

While every situation is unique, harmful sexual behaviours towards a parental figure could include:

- Engaging in explicit conversations or making sexualised comments

- Groping, touching, or attempting inappropriate physical contact

- Exposure or masturbation in front of a parent with the intent to provoke discomfort

- Creating or attempting to create explicit images or recordings of a parent

- Pressuring or coercing a parent into situations of a sexual nature

Please note, the above list is not exhaustive.

To use the words of one brave parent who experienced harmful sexual behaviour: "Telling someone your child hits you is one thing, telling someone your child has sexualised thoughts about you is another"

The Importance of Compassionate Intervention

To address this issue, it is vital to raise awareness. More open discussions are needed to ensure that this form of abuse is recognised and addressed. By breaking the silence, we can:

- Provide parents with access to specialist support

- Promote earlier intervention to reduce the likelihood of behaviours escalating

- Offer education and guidance to help families navigate these challenges

To effectively address child-to-parent sexual abuse, a compassionate and structured approach is required. This includes access to specialist intervention and support. Trained professionals in child sexual behaviour management can provide tailored strategies and therapeutic support to help families manage inappropriate behaviours and navigate the challenges they face.

It’s essential that we acknowledge the issue of child-to-parent sexual abuse and work to break the silence surrounding it. Families facing this challenge should not have to navigate it alone. By raising awareness, improving access to services, and fostering a non-judgmental approach, we can ensure that affected families receive the support, education, and solutions they need to move forward.

If you or someone you know is experiencing inappropriate sexualised behaviours from their child, remember: support is available. You are not alone, and seeking help is the first step toward healing.

For further support, consider reaching out to one of the following services:

- Survivors’ Network provides a list of local and national services. Link: https://survivorsnetwork.org.uk/resource/helplines-webchat-services/

- Rape Crisis offers a 24/7 Rape & Sexual Abuse Support Line, available every day of the year. Call free on 0808 500 2222 or visit https://rapecrisis.org.uk/get-help/want-to-talk/.

- SARSAS has a helpline and online chat available at various times, with e-support open 24/7. They aim to respond within one working day. Link: https://www.sarsas.org.uk/

- Samaritans has a helpline available 24/7, every day of the year. Call free on 116 123 or visit https://www.samaritans.org/